Roots and Wings Read online

  Copyright

  Published by

  Dreamspinner Press

  382 NE 191st Street #88329

  Miami, FL 33179-3899, USA

  http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Roots and Wings

  Copyright © 2011 by D.W. Marchwell

  Cover Art by Catt Ford

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without the written permission of the Publisher, except where permitted by law. To request permission and all other inquiries, contact Dreamspinner Press, 382 NE 191st Street #88329, Miami, FL 33179-3899, USA

  http://www.dreamspinnerpress.com/

  ISBN: 978-1-61372-188-9

  Printed in the United States of America

  First Edition

  November 2011

  eBook edition available

  eBook ISBN: 978-1-61372-189-6

  Dedications

  For Frank, Philip, Stacia,

  and all the fans who wanted a third story:

  Thank you for your patience and your support.

  For Michael Thomas Ford:

  Your stories helped me find my way back home.

  There are only two lasting bequests we can leave our children;

  one is roots, the other, wings.

  —Hodding Carter

  Chapter 1

  WILLIAM sat on the edge of his bed, scratching behind Billie’s ears, wondering when his father would come up to speak with him. He hadn’t meant to arrive home late this evening; it had just happened. He was at Wayde’s house, and they’d gotten to talking, and William hadn’t thought even once to check the clock or his watch. He’d been enjoying himself. He’d thought about trying to sneak into the house, but that would have just made things worse. He would probably be in enough trouble; he didn’t need to be adding fuel to the flames.

  No, William had told himself when he’d pulled up in David’s car—which was actually now his car—I’ll go in and tell the truth. But then there was that problem. How was he going to be able to tell his dad the truth about what had had him so scared that he was talking to Wayde? He knew that he could tell his dads anything and that they would understand, but he didn’t want this to be true, didn’t want them to find out what he’d done. They would probably be really angry with him for having been so careless and thoughtless. He wasn’t normally like that, but he hadn’t been able to help himself. It was as if his own brain had betrayed him. Or was it another body part a little lower down that had done his thinking for him? You’re almost seventeen years old, he scolded himself. Old enough to know better.

  William sat up straight, hearing someone coming. It was probably Jerry; David’s footsteps were a lot lighter on the hardwood. Billie looked up at him, tilting her head. William figured that she knew that something was up. He comforted her, scratching behind her ears again and under her chin. It’s okay, Billie, he’s not going to be angry with you. William breathed in and out, slow, deep breaths, and prepared himself for a scolding, and maybe more. He just hoped he would be able to handle the look of disappointment on his father’s face.

  He heard the knock at the door. “Come in,” William said. Even if they were sore at him, his fathers never, ever, entered his room without his permission. He heard the sound of the knob turning and then the creaky hinge whined as the door opened. “Hi, Dad, I’m really sorry. Wayde and I were talking, and I forgot to check the time. It’ll never happen again. I promise.” William made an X over his heart, which he figured would beat out of his chest any minute now.

  “Son,” Jerry said as he approached, sat beside William, and reached down to pet Billie. “We trust you, William. We believe you if you say it won’t happen again, but that’s not what I came up here for.” William felt his whole body relax. Jerry always used the word “we,” even if David wasn’t in the room.

  But his sense of relief was brief. William saw the look of concern on his father’s face and began to worry. “What’s wrong, Dad?” William felt a twinge of panic when his father didn’t answer right away, remembering then that he’d not seen David when he came into the house. And David was almost always there to welcome William home. Jerry had been in the office, on the phone, seeming upset and distracted—at me, William had figured. But he didn’t remember seeing David. “Is it David? Is something wrong? Where is he?”

  “Shhh,” Jerry soothed, putting an arm around his son’s shoulders. “No, no, nothing is wrong. David’s fine.” Jerry turned slightly to look at William. “Or at least he will be, but he’ll need our help.”

  “Where is he?”

  “While you were at Wayde’s, your grandfather Niels called to tell David that your grandmother was in a car accident.”

  “Is she okay?” William had never met David’s mother, the only member of his family he hadn’t met yet. David had said that it would probably happen one day, just as it had happened with David’s sisters and their children. Now, with this news, William wondered if he would ever get to meet her.

  “She was in a car accident. She lost consciousness and hit a lamp post on the street,” Jerry said, and William heard the heavy sigh from his father. “She was taken to the hospital. Your grandfather thinks it might be due to her diabetes. I guess she refuses to take her insulin or to check her blood sugar levels, and….”

  “Is David at the hospital?” William saw Jerry look at him and nod. “Can we go be with him?”

  Jerry smiled at him and tightened his arm. “Any other time, he’d love that, partner, but we’ll make sure we’re here for him when he gets home. Help him. Maybe do the cooking and laundry for a while.”

  William grimaced involuntarily at the thought of Jerry’s cooking, but then he heard the deep, rumbling laugh that had frightened him the first time he’d heard it almost seven years ago. But now, William loved to hear his father laugh, especially when Jerry was teasing David. And then there was David, his other father. David always thought that William didn’t know about his family, didn’t know that they’d abandoned David because of his sexual orientation. But William knew, and would never understand how anyone would not want David around. William loved everything about David; he was kind, smart, and funny. And there was no one else who could make William feel better, about everything, as fast as David could. Just by sitting beside him and stroking his head, David could always make William see that things would get better. “Whatever he needs, Dad.”

  Jerry shook his head, the big smile on his face making William feel like he’d said the right thing. “He loves you, very much, cowboy. When he left for the hospital, his first thought was for you, made me promise that I’d tell you not to worry about him.”

  Even though he was a teenager now, William still found himself overwhelmed by how lucky he was to have found David and Jerry. His eyes burned when he thought of David in the hospital, waiting to hear about a mother who’d abandoned him, and how David was still worrying about William. “I love him too, Dad. Love both of you, and Cory.”

  “Not Tara?” Jerry asked, nudging his shoulder.

  William laughed and nudged his father back. “Yeah, I guess. She makes Cory happy.” It wasn’t like William hated her, but more a constant reminder of what he’d been going through lately.

  “And you make us happy, chief.” Jerry kissed the side of his head. “You feel like coming down to the kitchen, keeping your old man company o
ver some ice cream?”

  “’Kay,” William said and stood when his father did. “Do you think we should go out and get him some ice cream sandwiches?”

  Jerry put his arm around his son’s shoulders again. “A whole box?”

  “Two boxes,” William countered and smiled when his father laughed again.

  As they reached the stairs, Jerry released his hold on William. “You know, I think you might actually be taller than David now.”

  William smiled and stood a little straighter, squaring his broad shoulders as he descended the stairs to the kitchen. “Remember how I used to drive David crazy, asking him to measure me every day?” William pointed to the wall at the entrance to the kitchen. “He never said anything about it. Just measured me and told me to keep eating right and exercising.” William turned to face his father when he reached the table, his father getting the bowls and spoons and handing them over, then grabbing the ice cream from the freezer. “Dad? Do you think we could send some flowers and a card?”

  Jerry arranged the bowls and spoons and ice cream on the table, and brought his hand to his son’s cheek. “We’ll see about that in the morning, cowboy.” William was a little stunned when Jerry, all of a sudden, wrapped him up in a big bear hug. “You’re a good man, William. And David will love that you thought of that, to do that for him and his mother.”

  William felt the flush creep up his cheeks. He was used to the almost-constant touching and hugging from David, but when Jerry did it, William knew he’d done something really great. But as he sat down at the table and filled both bowls with ice cream, he turned to study his dad while he got the chocolate sauce and the cherries. Will he still feel the same way when he finds out what I’ve done?

  “DO YOU know when he’ll be back?”

  Jerry looked over at his son, not really sure of the answer. He wouldn’t be surprised if David stayed there all night, frantic for any bit of news, and so conscious of how much his sisters needed him. “I don’t know, son. I’m hoping that he’ll be back soon.”

  “Did she abandon him just because he’s gay?” William’s voice was hushed, as if he thought they weren’t all alone in the house. The question shocked Jerry a little bit. He looked up, his face probably showing confusion, into William’s eyes and saw William shrug. “I’ve known for a while. I sometimes hear the two of you talking when you think I can’t hear you.” William looked down at his ice cream, something he only did when he felt he’d done something wrong, and Jerry worried for both of his boys. David would not like the idea that William knew this piece of information, and William obviously didn’t like the idea that someone had hurt David.

  “I think that’s probably a big part of the reason, son.” Jerry let his spoon drop into the bowl, the ice cream only half-eaten. “But I also think that David and your grandmother are very much alike. David was always… concerned… at how your grandmother treated her own mother. I don’t think that David really understood why his mother did some of the things she did.” Jerry shrugged and picked his spoon back up. “And I don’t think your grandmother really approved of some of the choices that David made.”

  Jerry thought he could see some wheels turning in William’s head. He’d seemed distracted lately, as if he was working some problems out on his own. If that was the case, Jerry didn’t want to push his son into talking until he felt ready to speak about it. It was one of the many things that David had taught him about parenting. And it was one of the reasons Jerry had this life he loved so much. His days were filled with love and happiness and every emotion Jerry had always thought made other men, lesser men, weak. But here he was, sitting with his son, both of them worried about a man who meant the world to them.

  Jerry sat across from William, his heart torn between the love he felt for this wonderful young man he and David had raised together and the ache he felt for what his husband was going through, alone, at the hospital. He wanted to be there beside his husband, but David was right; someone had to be home for William. And while Jerry was happy to be the one to stay home with their son, he knew he wouldn’t be sleeping very well tonight; he never did when David wasn’t sleeping beside him. And when he came back, David would be hurting. Nothing in the world hurt Jerry as much as seeing one of his men in pain. But Jerry would make sure that he was there for his husband. The man had given him everything, had been everything to him every day for the last seven years, and Jerry would make sure he was taken care of and got what he needed, got whatever Jerry could give.

  Seven years. It was hard to believe sometimes that Jerry had had his own family for almost seven years now. William only had another year of high school, and then he would be going off to university to become a veterinarian. Jerry and David would have the house to themselves. And while Jerry had plenty of activities planned to keep them busy—activities that wouldn’t see them out of the bedroom too often—he was already beginning to worry about how David would cope without William and Cory.

  It wasn’t like David would be a complete basket case, but Jerry knew his husband well enough to know that David would definitely go through some withdrawal. Empty nest, Jerry had heard it called. Just last night Jerry and David had been in bed, their arms around each other, when David had commented on how empty the house would seem without William. Cory had only been with them for two years before he left for Ryerson University, but David had felt that absence like a physical, palpable thing. David had spent the last seven years nurturing and loving and worrying about William, so Jerry didn’t even want to think what would happen to David when William finally left home.

  Jerry looked up at the handsome face of his son, always so taken aback by the bright blue eyes and the tousled blond hair. William had not worn a buzz cut in quite a few years, but Jerry would always think of his son that way. The small, scared little boy who’d shown up on his doorstep seven years ago was now almost a grown man. William was six feet tall, healthy, handsome, and one of the kindest, most loving people he’d ever met. He knew he’d played a part in that, but he also knew it was David who had helped that frightened ten-year-old little boy become the fine young man Jerry was so proud to call his son.

  “Dad?”

  Jerry smiled at his son, wondering how long he’d been off in his own little world. “Sorry?”

  “Can I talk to you about something?”

  “Of course—”

  Jerry didn’t finish his sentence when he heard the front door open. He was out of his chair and had his arms wrapped around David before the tired man could even get his boots off. He didn’t say anything at first. Then he felt arms around his waist, and heard the long sigh that came from David’s tired body. “How is she?”

  “They may have to amputate her left arm,” David said, his voice a mere whisper. “It was pretty banged up in the crash. But the doctor was quite clear that if she didn’t start taking better care of herself, stop the drinking and use her insulin, that she won’t last much longer.”

  Jerry said nothing. What could he say? He kissed the top of David’s head and held on as he felt the first tremors shoot through his husband’s body. He knew that this wonderful man would try to be brave, but he also knew that the tears and the grieving would come soon enough. And Jerry would make sure he was there to do whatever he could.

  “DAVID?”

  David heard William’s voice and looked past Jerry to see their beautiful son looking so worried. He forced a smile and let go of Jerry. “Did you have fun with Wayde?” David knew he’d been busted, that William obviously knew why he hadn’t been here to welcome William when he got home, but he didn’t want to burden their son with news that none of them was able to do anything about.

  “I’m sorry about your mom,” William said as he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around David.

  If David had been successful at fending off the inevitable tears while Jerry had held him and had caressed his back, he failed miserably once he heard those words, felt the love and the worry coming from this tall,
strapping young man.

  “Can I make you something to eat?” William asked as David pulled away slightly and brushed the hair out of his son’s eyes. “Dad and I were just having ice cream. I think we still have some vanilla left.”

  “No,” David said, forcing a smile and releasing William. Thank you God, David thought, as he looked at their son and realized he was actually shorter than William. “I think you’re taller than I am now.”

  William laughed. “Dad said the same thing before you got back.”

  “How about popcorn and a movie?” Jerry had his arms around both of them, walking them to the kitchen.

  David broke free momentarily to toe off his shoes and then returned to the safety and comfort of Jerry’s arms. “Can it be a comedy?”

  “How about that new one by Adam something-or-other, the guy from SNL?” William asked. He was at the table, collecting the bowls and moving them to the sink to rinse and place in the dishwasher. David watched for a moment as William fetched the popcorn, the butter, the salt, and the popcorn maker. It was retro, like the one he remembered using as a child. Full circle, he thought as he realized that the roles were already reversing. Just as David would now begin to care for his ailing parents, William was now beginning to care for him and Jerry.

  “Sounds good to me,” David said as he let himself be led to the living room. Jerry’s arm was still around him as they both sat on the sofa, Jerry’s lips finding his temple and kissing it slowly.

  “I’m sorry to say, baby, that William knows about your mother disowning you.”

  David looked up quickly, wondering how their son could have possibly found out. I was so careful, David thought. “You told him?”

  “No, sir,” Jerry whispered, his deep voice still able to cause shivers up and down David’s spine. “Told me he hears us talking when we think he can’t hear us.”